Death From Above

If a Person that died says on his will that all his money should be buried with him can we say that money can be planted?
If so, not only land can be valued but also the underground, I´m sure moles would find themselves ways of getting some glasses


What is Bungee Jumping but suicide attempts not taken seriously

Best Argument

I’m sure all of you heard of the Oscar category named” best argument”, well, here’s a list of some possible nominations,since its best argument, boxing duels are not allowed of course:

John says:” you and me Alex. outside! immediately, otherwise ill break your face here
Alex replies: “hey! Don’t push your luck mate!! or else…”
John questions himself: “Or else what?”
John answers enthusiastically: “or else……… youu …MIGHT WIN A TRIP TO CANCUN WITH BREAKFAST REGIME INCLUDED!!! :D

Michael turns to Jim and says: “ hey…pass me that soda will ya?
Jim replies: “ ahah, go get it yourself you lazy bastard! “
Michael strikes: “ hoy! You’re getting on my nerves you twat!”
Jim brilliantly raps it off: “really? And to think that you were not a drug addict :P”

David says: “ i´m really tired of studying for this exam, I guess im taking a break now”
Sarah mocks: “ahah,,you´re such a pussy, cant handle a stupid exam”
David reposts: “leave me alone, im loosing my edge here!”
Sarah finishes off: “ better take the plane the next time then :P “

Super Heros true identity

Darth Vader(Star Wars)
Asmatic mid aged geek that finds himself confident when dressed inblack

Snarf (Thundercats)
Drug addict, Rehab frequenter who’s trapped in an adorable looking cat figure. Long bearded dwarfs don’t fool me!


Bumblebee (Transformers)
Unemployed taxi that was unable to sort out a proper taxi driver due to his “metamorphic” problems .

Optimus Prime( Transformers)
Narcissistic transformer with self esteem problems that in the TRA (transformer robots anonymous) reunion was told he wasn’t able to transform into nothing but a truck

He-Man (He-Man and the masters of the universe)
Self Confessed Homosexual who obviously is afraid to come out of the closet and reclaims he’s ”the master of the universe”, I Reckon that universe must be Broadway or something, that haircut has to have some purpose.

Miscellaneous-part 3

I wanted to give old clothes to charity once, but what if a new fashion trend arrives and i got nowhere to turn? :P

Sluts are like cab drivers.. they wait for us, we are kindly invited to "penetrate" them and they might take us to places that we never been before

I wonder if a Hunger Strike in favor of the the Anorexic People´s rights would be taken seriously.

Sacré Bleu

What would a policeman say to a burglar mime who was robbing a bank?
"you have the right to remain still, every re-enactment of any weapon or rope should be used against you in death sentence if necessary”

Publicity Stunt

Imagine a funeral shop with a massive financial crisis in hand and lack of demand, in extreme situations like this It would be favorable to the shop to be Advertised trough a huge sparkling neon sign saying something like “Die Here!!!” for example, therefore it would get the drivers attentions on the road, causing accidents and more “clients” to the store itself: P

Time Honoured Tradition

Ever wondered what artists are on about when receiving awards on some ceremony? "I would like to thank the people from my record label… they know who they are". What da?!??! Well, I was studying this and came out with some conclusions for the reasons to this sentence:

a) The people they’re thanking had existential crisis and are now on a good conditional stage
b) Not only they’re thanking them for the support but also for not having any more existential crisis coz if they had it, the artist by now could have been a fisherman and not a musician
c) The artist wanted to make a statement to prove the record company is not run by babies and were already informed of their names by their mothers.

Which might be the correct reason? If you went for b) congratulations! You might wanna thank me now, and say to me that I know who I am : P

Perfect Thefts #1

Some person going to the supermarket, shopping for markers, takes them out of their package to see its color (by writing in the same package) and not taking the product.

Post It

Mushi-Mushi

Ever wonder why china has so much population? And what about when cartoon characters dig holes and end up in the other part of the world which, for reasons unknown, is always in China? No wonder you find these specimens out on the streets there then-->

Not tested in humans

If all the existing moles were claustrophobic there would be earthquakes spread all over the world

Even if a baby glow worm was afraid of the dark there would be plenty of presence lights to back him up

Best Songs2006

1º Lily Allen - LDN
2º Klaxons-Atlantis to interzone
3º CSS-Superafim
4º The Pipettes - Pull Shapes
5º The Strokes-Razorblade
6º Be Your Own Pet- Adventure.
7º The Automatic -Monster
8º Artic Monkeys-A Certain Romance
9º Test icicles - catch it
10º Artic Monkeys- Fake Tales of San Francisco
11º CSS- Let's make love and listen death from above
12º Lily Allen-smile
13º Jamie T-Sheila
14º CSS-Bezzi
15º Be Your Own Pet- Girls On TV
16º The Kooks - she moves in her own way
17º Clap Your Hands Say Yeah - The Skin Of My Yellow Country Teeth
18º The Strokes-You Only Live Once
19º Get Cape.Wear Cape.Fly.-Call Me Ishmael
20º The Gossip - Listen Up!
21º The Longcut- A Tried And Tested Method
22º The Guillemots-Made Up Love Song #43
23º The Gossip - Standing In The Way Of Control
24º Lily Allen-Not Big
25º Cat Power-TheGreatest
26º The Long Blondes-once and never again
27º Scissor Sisters - I Don't Feel Like Dancing
28º The Sounds-24 Hours
29º Lady Sovereign - Random
30º Regina Spektor-Fidelity
31º The Fratellis-Chelsea Dagger
32º The Long Blondes-Seperated By Motorways
33º Albert Hammond junior - back to the 101
34º The Longcut-Spires
35º Clap Your Hands Say Yeah - In This Home On Ice
36º The Rakes- Work, Work, Work (Pub, Club, Sleep)
37º The Killers - Read my mind
38º The Sunshine Underground - Put You In Your Place
39º The Rakes - 22 Grand Job
40º Klaxons- Gravity´s rainbow

00/00/00 -->worldwide holiday(beginning of the world)

A good way for a couple to save some money with their son´s presents is to calculate the exact time to procreate for the baby to be born in the Christmas day, therefore he would only deserve one gift and make the couple spendings way more cheap! :D

The Elixir of youth is to be born in the 29th of February! Therefore you only age after 4 years pass by! :P

Emo´s Cook Book

To all the emos out there,
Throw yer wrists in the air,
Cut them like you just dont care

Best in Music 2006

Make Tea Not Love

I’ve Finally Figured out the solution to stop the war, every nation should be only armed with champagne bottles, not only the soldiers would have a single shot but they would get to drunk until they could “reload” their ammunition.

sigh hail!

If I asked you what similarities exist between dictators and retards you probably would say all of them, but in my view there’s a major one, these are only the 2 groups of people whom people agree with in all of their view points just to give them satisfaction

The Gap!(between the rich and the poor)

In this great era of major advance in all sorts of developments how come homeless people haven’t fixed an autopilot to do their begging for change “work”?